Mexican Stand-off

It's staring at you from across the room, little eyes shining in the moonlight, lying in wait for you to make just one wrong move. You are sitting there exhausted by the previous fight, alone in the dark, and you're waiting for it to once again let out the banshee scream that reverberates through the whole house. You know you won't win this way....but you'll be damned if you let overpower
you and come out the victor!

Mexican standoff (defined as: most precisely a confrontation between opponents, facing each other, with no clear winner. Each participant holds power over one opponent, and is at the mercy of the other opponent. Following any path of who holds power over whom invariably leads back to the original person after visiting all other participants. More opponents can be added as long as they fit into the above rule and thus do not change the balance of power.)





What I am talking about is bed time, as this does pertain to many other arguments as well.. It has been a battle for both of my kids since they were born.
12 year old never slept in her own bed until we moved to CR and she had a full size bed. And even that was about a month of her waking up and calling to me to be 'tucked back in' and begging me to lay down with her.
Now with 2 year old, she's HATED sleeping when she was a baby, only being held to sleep would work, and sometimes not even then. So many night of my crying, walking, and bouncing her pleading her to go to sleep.  Thought it would get better or that she would grow out of it. Especially when we moved to a 'big girl' bed. We have a pretty decent bed time routine, bath, stories, snack, drink, lights out. I have to be in the room until she falls asleep - which usually results in me falling sleep too and not coming out of her room until 10 or 10:30 most night. AND she still wakes up around 3, in which we come out on the couch to finish sleeping. Therefore affecting every aspect of life outside of the 2 year old world - no sleeping with husband, 12 year old getting woken up by the crying, no alarm, all warm and snuggling that you don't want to get up nor will 2 year old let you(therefore getting ready late), sharing a small space with a monkey playing twister.

I've tried all the tricks: crying it out, threats, rewards, taking her back in her bed after she gets out, sitting in there ignoring her, letting her pass out, giving her naps/not giving naps, nightlights(which she hates), stuffed animals, etc, etc.

It really has gotten better in the past few weeks, it's usually becoming me being a broken record of telling her to settle down to sleep instead of us screaming at each other because she doesn't want  to sleep and I want her too.

I still 'tuck' in my 12 year old when I am not fighting with 2 year old about sleeping and if I don't then husband does. 

Am I making my children co-dependent sleepers,  am I making it so that they can't sleep alone or fall asleep without me or something to assist them?? I don't think so, but we'll see when they are 30 and call me at 3am to 'tuck' them back in or 'rock' them back to sleep. For right now, it's a comfort thing, and it works for me(most of the time. But most of all, I'm glad I'm still needed for some things through this independent stage from both my kids.